By Joseph Hawkins
CAUTION: This is a review of a webcomic that is only recommended for 13-year-olds and above.
Sburb is a virtual game that really isn’t virtual because if you die in the game, you die in reality. (Unless your corpse kissed before your dreamself dies or if you’re on your quest bed.) Your quest bed is where you are killed so you become the ultimate level, god tier! The god tier is when you climb the echeladder (an achievement counter) and become a fairy-esque version of yourself and earn amazing powers.
There are twelve aspects: time, void, space, heart, doom, hope, life, light, blood, mind, rage, and breath. There are also twelve classes: rogue, thief, heir, maid, mage, page, bard, sylph, seer, knight, prince, and lord.
There are a ton of characters: humans (beta kids, alpha kids, parents and Andrew Hussie), gray-skinned aliens with horns called trolls, cherubs, dream planet inhabitants called Prospitians and Dersites, exiles (Prospitians and Dersites that survived the massacre on Prospit and Derse and went to the post-apocalyptic Earth), and the first guardians (things created and powered by the green sun. A green sun is the size of the universe and creates power for infernal beings like Jack Noir, Doc Scratch and Bec, as well as Lord English. There are also felt creatures, wrigglers, pets (including a dog named Bec and a cat named Jaspers/Frigglish, a demonic puppet named Lil’ Cal, lusii (parents of trolls), consorts (things on your planets that are amphibious and reptilian), denizens (big bosses on your planet) and smuppets (naked, weird-looking puppets that are located everywhere in one of the character’s apartments).
ColabHQ is a Youtube account that made Homestuck into a movie. If you cannot access the site (mspaintadventures.com), then you can watch Homestuck. There are alternate universes (initiated through the Scratch, a thing where you start the game/universe over and create new players), plenty of paradoxes, a ludicrous amount of death, more puppets than needed and terrible rapping.
As we quote an amazing Youtuber, “You can’t fight the Homestuck. Though it’s weird and random, it’s the greatest fandom. You can’t fight the Homestuck. True, it’s quite outrageous but it’s so contagious.”
Sixth grader Joe Hawkins, Thurmont Middle School, Frederick County, enjoys fandom and reading fan fiction. He wrote this story with a fellow classmate.